The trouble with men is they don't know how to communicate how they feel. We may fall in love with them at first sight, hate their guts one minute until they do something nice another, or even just be a best friend but not matter what, depending on the guy, most men will not admit to their true feelings. They're like people with clam shells. Do anything "scary" and they shut right up.
This is especially so with gay men. All they want is sex and they will stop at nothing to get it. Although in my case, I'm surrounded by straight men and would love to do them! Although their girlfriends would have something to say and I would lose more friends that way. It's complicated. Although most straight men are okay with gay men, men do know what other men want. Which is sex. So I can understand, from a homophobic standpoint how a straight man would want to avoid a gay man. Then again if men helped each other out I think that would be a step closer to world peace.
There are three words that I have used and have heard that have been used that can scare off a man. Guaranteed.
Love: Saying I love you is one of the most scary things a man can hear. Especially after sex. I myself am now developing the ability to separate sex and love, which is a shame because they should be related. I mean if the majority of straight couples can get it right, I'm sure it's not brain surgery for the rest of us. There's a difference between jerking off and love and a man doesn't want to be loved just for jerking off, let me tell you that. I sure don't. I don't need someone saying "Oh I love you!" after just a quick session... look if I really loved you, I'd make it super special and memorable, we wouldn't be hear in a dark alley honey!
Relationship: Not so much a scary word but most single men do try to avoid this. I mean they're free free free until whoops they're in this complicated thing with another human being. Relationships do relate to resposiblity; they'll have to clean up after themselves and *gasp* take out the grabage! I can relate! I mean I absolutely care about appearances now but there was a time where I didn't do my laundry for two weeks, tops! Think men preferr friendships rather than relationships... relationships have things like obedience, engagement, shopping, and romance, where friendships have strippers, beer, laughing. Sounds like more fun if you're into that.
Commitment: This isn't so much a scary word as it is a trainable quality. Men can commit to something like snow can commit to sunlight. It's gonna be a little difficult. I mean the sun can tell the snow "I wanna see you," and it will stay, but then the snow gets hard and crunchy which sucks to make snowmen. And if you can't make snowmen, how in the hell are your hillbilly neighbours going to blow it up with the rest of their dynomite, tape it, and then send it to America's funniest home videos? Impossible! Okay so my own family won't have a fun holiday, but it's all the sun's fault. Okay, enough metaphors. What I'm trying to get at is most men who aren't looking for a good solid relationship are gonna avoid commitment.
These things aren't all bad things. It's what makes them appealing, attracting and charming. Boys, be proud that you are what you are. Not all of you are like this messed up son of a bitch... I mean if you have any kind of irrational fear of love, relationship and commitment, I'm not doctor, but i reccomend some professional help. But we (everyone who likes boys anyway) like that and we want them more. A fact of basic human nature; what we can't get, we want desperately. Like flies on a dead animal; we only have so long till it spoils, dig in!
I naturally fall for this type of messed up kind of person. Unfortunately this boyfriend with his
excess baggage should be put on the next train to ex-boyfriend ville!
After all this has been said though, there are two guys who I have had the pleasure to meet in my lifetime. Brothers they are, but they are the best friends in the world and both are happy in their current relationships. Let me just say that they are both equally good looking but both are tragically, terminally straight... story of my fucking life!
One of them I've recently hung out with, he's the younger one. He's a sweetheart, an angel and I just love him to death. Laughs at anything I say, that's supposed to be funny anyway, and is completely adorable. He's told me about one old flame, in which he was forced into a lot of things. In fact his appearance has beared the brunt of it, I'm sure. But even after all that, he proposed. P-R-O-P-O-S-E-D! That's huge! I'm proud of him for the fact that he had the guts to do that! 20 years old, you know what you want, so you propose! WOW! Great! And what does she do? Says no and leaves him. What. The. Fuck? He's now happily in a new relationship (hasn't proposed yet) but both are my dear, dear friends and I hope they last a long time.
The other is the older brother and I haven't hung out with him in ages... okay almost a year, but I think I can facebook stalk him, and probably text him or email him. I'm above that but I'm not beneath that either. He's never told me about his past relationship but a what I think is a huge thing that he said was... if he were gay, he would totally go out with me. It was nice but a little torturing at the same time, so I said "why aren't you?" He's also a sweetie and I'm glad to have him in my life, even if he isn't my life partner, knowing that he would like to gives me a little hope.
On that note, I hope for a lot of things. I hope for equality of people. I hope for no more wars. I hope to be a huge sucess. I hope for marriage. I hope for a big FABULOUS wedding gown. I hope for happiness. I hope for a future as bright and as sunny as today is goingto be. With blue skies, love, laughter... a little more sequins. I hope for brotherhood, sisterhood, cousinhood, parenthood, childhood, neighbourhood, ganghood, hoodhood, and hoodies to never die out as time goes by. I hope they all last through a big wash and rinse cycle I like to call "life" and never fade.
Until next time.
